Pee

Daughter: Mom, why do you have to go to the bathroom already? We just went a few minutes ago!
Mother: I don't know… I guess I'm like a dog, I have to leave my scent everywhere…

–Sandy Hook, New Jersey

Daughter: Mom, why do you have to go to the bathroom already? We just went a few minutes ago!
Mother: I don't know… I guess I'm like a dog, I have to leave my scent everywhere…

–Sandy Hook, New Jersey

20-something girl #1, coming out of water: Oh my god! I got stage fright, I couldn't go.
20-something girl #2: Oh, there's Danielle!! (points down to beach)
20-something girl #1: As soon as she gets here we're going back in, I have to pee so badly!
20-something girl #2: Hey, Danielle!
Danielle: Ohmigod, you guys! My herpes burns so badly!
(all three walks into water)

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Sweedie

Girl: Can you tell me why you’re pissing on the sand?
Guy: We’re in Jersey.
Girl: Yeah, so?
Guy: Jersey’s dirty. It’s your duty as an American to fuckin’ keep it that way, bitch.

–Merivale Avenue, Beach Haven, New Jersey

Overheard by: Snow White

Young boy: Your uncle peed on Mikey last night!

–Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, California

Big mama in bathroom stall with daughter: Hurry up and pee!
Young girl: Mommy, I can’t pee with other people around!
Big mama: Honey, if and when you go to jail, you gonna hafta pee in front of other people.

–Scarborough Beach, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Riley

Little girl: Guess what Daddy told me, Mommy!
Mother: What’s that?
Little girl: When you sweat, it’s like your skin is peeing all over you!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Mandy

Small boy running back from the ocean: Mom! I have to pee!
Mom: Just go in the ocean.
Boy: I tried, but the waves kept pushing my pants back up!

–Bethany Beach, Delaware

Hysterical mom to toddler in bathroom stall: Goddamit Jeffrey, stop trying to pull it off and just piss out of it!

–Bathroom Stall, Mall, Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Sandy Paws

Fat blubbery man to wife: C'mon already! Let's go in the water–I gotta take a piss!

–Caribbean

Overheard by: Grossed Out