Pee

Man outside single bathroom door: Wolf breath, what are you doing in there?
Woman, from inside bathroom: What the fuck do you think I'm doing in here? What the fuck do you do in the bathroom?
Man outside bathroom: Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to.

–Coney Island, New York

Overheard by: Lisa Mavinelli

Teen girl #1: I can’t believe people pee in the ocean — it’s so gross.
Teen girl #2: I know, right!
Teen girl #1: Yeah, I only pee in swimming pools. It’s cleaner.

–Venice Beach, California

Overheard by: I prefer the toilet

Loud, drunk sorostitute leaving bar to drunk frat boy: When we get back, I'm gonna piss all over your pussy.

–Daytona Beach, Florida