Guy walking on the sand: I fucking hate the beach! I hate sand and it's not getting any better. Look, more sand!
–Jones Beach, New York
Guy walking on the sand: I fucking hate the beach! I hate sand and it's not getting any better. Look, more sand!
–Jones Beach, New York
Tween #1: So, like, what did you eat in Africa?
Tween #2: Like rice and stuff.
Tween #1: Like white rice or brown rice?
Tween #2: White rice.
Tween #1: Like, ew. You can get so fat from that! Oh my God, is that why those Africans in those picture you have, have huge bellies?
Tween #2: You are beyond retarded!
–Second Beach, Newport, Rhode Island
Baggy-Pants boy #1: I don’t take off my shoes at the beach.
Baggy-Pants boy #2: How are you going to walk in the water?
Baggy-Pants boy #1: I’ll just keep them on. Is there a law that says you have to be barefoot in the ocean?
Baggy-Pants boy #2: No. But there’s a law that says if you do that, you’re gonna look like a jackass.
–Fort Lauderdale Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Lesley
Nagging wife on bicycle to defeated downtrodden husband on bicycle: The more I talk to you, the more my stomach is getting aggravated… 'cause you're an asshole!
–South Beach Boardwalk, New York
Overheard by: J9 and G-Rod
20-something: You have no imagination.
Teenage brother: Masturbators have more imagination than you!
–Midland Beach, New York
Overheard by: Mr Puff Nubbins
Girl: So, out of all the people in this circle, who have you been sexually involved with?
Queer: Does pecking count?
Girl: Yes.
Queer points at everyone.
Girl 1: You man-whore! So, if pecking doesn’t count, who have you done anything with?
Queer: Everyone except her.
Girl: So you’re still a whore.
–Centennial Beach, British Columbia, Canadia
Overheard by: shutterbug
Man on a bike, on cell: Is this where you become an evil bitch?
–Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Ilyse
Guy: You look really hot in that bikini.
Girl #1: I’m not really in the mood for flirting today so why don’t you just buy me a lemon ice, I’ll pretend I like you, and we’ll both be on our way.
Guy, as he walks away: Bitch.
Girl #2, walking up to her: Wasn’t that your boyfriend?
Girl #1: Yeah. I’m so tired of him being a dick all the time.
Guy comes back with a lemon ice.
–Boardwalk, Jones Beach, New York
Overheard by: Batwon
Guy: You look really hot in that bikini.
Girl #1: I’m not really in the mood for flirting today so why don’t you just buy me a lemon ice, I’ll pretend I like you, and we’ll both be on our way.
Guy, as he walks away: Bitch.
Girl #2, walking up to her: Wasn’t that your boyfriend?
Girl #1: Yeah. I’m so tired of him being a dick all the time.
Guy comes back with a lemon ice.
–Boardwalk, Jones Beach, New York
Overheard by: Batwon