Woman #1: How are you, Sam? I haven't seen you forever.
Woman #2: We need to catch up more often. How are you?
Woman #1: Don't even ask. Only a couple of weeks ago I realized I had crabs, and just yesterday I found out my daughter has herpes. (sighs)
Woman #2: The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. At least you're getting some action.
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Marissa
Woman in public toilets: Relax, goddamn it!
–Jetty Road, Australia
Drunk boy: Anemic? Isn't that when you eat too much white bread?
–Poolside, Perth, Australia
Little boy #1: I'm getting really tanned on this holiday.
Little boy #2: Yeah, you're turning into an aboriginal. When I grow up I want to be an aboriginal like you.
–Batemans Bay, Australia
Girl on drugs, rubbing random person's stomach: Your belly feels like my belly, but on someone else!
–Byron Bay, Australia
Chick #1: Oh my god, look at that Will*! Isn’t he hot? He’s wearing a sweater, and it’s boiling!
Chick #2: Nah, junkies can’t feel.
–St. Kilda Beach, Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: knee coal
Beach guy to bikini girl: I'd bend over, but my arse hurts too much.
–Sydney, Australia
Overheard by: Felicity
