Teens

Teenage boy #1: I'm gonna grab your nipple.
Teenage boy #2: You better grab my nipple!

–Head of the Fish Regatta, Saratoga Springs, New York

Teen to promoter throwing Halloween candy: Bitch, gimme somma dem fuckin' dots!

–West Palm Beach, Florida

Teenage boy: Well, last time I was here I got arrested…

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: arc

Teen girl #1: Pick a vegetable!
Teen girl #2: I know mine — tomato!
Teen girl #3: Dumbass, a tomato’s a fruit. Choose again.
Teen girl #2: Ginger!
Teen girl #1: Should I pick an easier category?

–Emerald Isle, North Carolina

Teenage girl: Rob Lowe is ridiculously hot. Hey, did you know he has a sex tape?
Girl's mother: Yes, I did know that because I starred in it with him. And he was good.

–Biloxi, Mississippi

Teen: You guys went to bed at 11:30, what's wrong with you?

–Beach Lake, Pennsylvania

Tween at fireworks display: Oh my god! We could, like, write ‘Fourth of July’ all over our legs, and that would get people to notice us!

–Evanston, Illinois

Overheard by: Sean

Teen boy on beach, moving desperately: Holy fuck, there's something in my shorts!
Teen floozy in too-tight hot pink rubber bands: No shit, Sherlock. I was riding it last night.

–Tybee, Georgia

Overheard by: Sunbather pining for her girlfriend

Furious teenage boy to other teens: Just because you call “no-homo” before you do something doesn't mean it's not gay!

–Coney Island, New York

White teen girl #1: The first rule of being white is never admitting that you’re white.
White teen girl #2: Oh! I never admit that!

–Avon Beach, New Jersey

Overheard by: NotFromJersey