Young Boy: Mommy Mommy, they have Nemo in that fish tank!
Mom: Honey, Nemo’s dead.
–Antigua, the Caribbean
Overheard by: Ollie
Archive for the ‘Kids’ Category
If You Turn Out to Be Gay
Little boy: I can’t believe we went under. I still have that taste in my mouth!
Dad: Get used to it. You’ll be tasting that your whole life.
–Horseneck Beach, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kp & Cd
From Cool Uncle to Creepy Uncle in Three Gimlets
Young boy: Your uncle peed on Mikey last night!
–Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, California
Both… Neither… Whatever Turns You on, Kid
Little boy: Was that lady a ‘he’ or a ‘she’?
–Hilo, Hawaii
Overheard by: Gwen
Nevermind. How Do You Keep a Turkey in Suspense?
Boy: Hey, Dad, are monkeys fast?
Dad: I guess compared to humans, yes.
Boy: Are cheetahs fast?
Dad: Yes, they are the fastest.
Boy: Are lions fast?
Dad: Yes, very.
Boy: Are bamboozles fast?
Dad: What?
–Trunk Bay, St. John, US Virgin Islands
Overheard by: Sonia
She’ll Have a Flashback to This Moment, Years Later in the Back of a Car
Four-year-old girl (disappointed, looking at a jellyfish): I’ve never seen one of these before…but I thought it would be longer.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: I Was Surprised Too
A Cool Guy Would Play with His Daughter
Little girl: Daddy! Guess what I am supposed to be!
Dad: You are a crab.
Little girl: Right! Okay, Daddy, now it’s your turn.
Dad sits there, talking to his wife.
Little girl: Daddy! You are supposed to be something!
Dad: I am. I am being a cool guy.
–Horseshoe Bay Ferry Terminal, Vancouver, Canadia
To Some White People, There’s Only One Big Black Person
Six-year-old girl (about book on Obama): That’s our new President!
Teen: Yeah, do you know what his name is?
Six-year-old girl: Martin Luther King!
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: tori
Time to Go Back in the Water, Sweetie
Little girl: Guess what Daddy told me, Mommy!
Mother: What’s that?
Little girl: When you sweat, it’s like your skin is peeing all over you!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Mandy
I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means
Little boy: I don’t want to put on sunscreen!
Older sister: Do you want to look like a Nang?
Little boy: What?
Older sister: Well, that’s the thing about Nangs, they get burnt!
–Byron Bay, Australia
