Questions

Salty sea dog: And the new LED Christmas lights? They’ll never burn down your Christmas tree. You’ll have to do that yourself.

–Morro Bay, California

Overheard by: Colin

Teenage girl: I can't wait to get a tattoo on my lower back.
Tween boy #1: Why would you want a tattoo there? How are you going to be able to see it?
Tween boy #2: It's not for her, stupid, it's for the dudes she lets do her in the butt doggy-style.

–St. Simon's Island, Georgia

Overheard by: John

Tourist guy: How will we know when we get to the beach?
Bus driver, staring at him: I think you’ll figure it out.

–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia

Overheard by: SYDNEYGUY

20-something guy: If someone offered you a thousand dollars to let them break your leg, would you say yes? I would. I'd say “hell yeah, break that shit in half!”

–Siesta Key, Florida

Guy #1: I can’t believe you did that! How could you? After all this time! I thought I knew you!
Guy #2, very loudly: It’s my butt and it’s gonna be fucked if I want it to!

–Enseada Beach, Brazil

Overheard by: Natasha

Guy #1: I can’t believe you did that! How could you? After all this time! I thought I knew you!
Guy #2, very loudly: It’s my butt and it’s gonna be fucked if I want it to!

–Enseada Beach, Brazil

Overheard by: Natasha

Girl, noticing bird poop on leg: Oh, shit! Why do I always get pooped on?!

–Oval Beach, Michigan

Overheard by: Steph

Guy on cell, sighing: What are you gonna do, y’know? I mean, besides putting a flashlight in your vagina… Too bad.

–Delray Beach, Florida

Overheard by: TK

Girl #1: You know what would feel really good?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: If you jizzed on my back.

–Oceanside Beach, California

Dude #1: Wouldn't it be cool if you could just get surgery to switch your heart and, say, your liver?
Dude #2: What?
Dude #1: Then, if someone came up to you and said, “I'm gonna stab you in the heart!” you could be like, “I'd like to see you try!”

–Dewey Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Suprchick