Central America

Teen tourist: Oh my God, there’s a high school over there! Wait, does that mean people actually live here? I thought it was just a tourist place. Weird.

–Aruba

Tourist guy: Can I get a banana daiquiri with dark rum?
Dominican Bartender: Sí.

Tourist guy receives a banana daiquiri in one glass and another full of dark rum.

–Punta Cana, Dominican Republic

Overheard by: Devon

Young Boy: Mommy Mommy, they have Nemo in that fish tank!
Mom: Honey, Nemo’s dead.

–Antigua, the Caribbean

Overheard by: Ollie

Spring breaker bimbette #1, about ordering drinks: And get Coco Rico, and Sex on the Beach…
Spring breaker bimbette #2, interrupting: Wait, isn't there also something called Sex in the Basement?

–Tamarindo, Costa Rica

Overheard by: one of them spoke decent Spanish, at least

Seven-year old boy: Those boys over there are looking at you.
Bronzed teen sister in bikini: Oh really? [Looks pleased.]Seven-year old boy: Yeah. I guess it’s cause you have that weird sunburn.

–Liberia, Costa Rica

American tourist, to black islander carving a sculpture from a log: You people are so talented!

–Straw Market, Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Dumbfounded Tourist

Southern blonde to older, female family members: Aaaah, there's a bee in my titties!
(commotion ensues)
Sketchy guy, loudly: I'll look for it if you want.

–San Juan Beach, Puerto Rico