California

Girl: We need to date boys who are smart and rich. Our boyfriends are stupid and poor and don’t even have the same wireless provider as us.

–Laguna Beach, California

Queer: So, like, let me get this straight. God got this lady pregnant and made her have a baby and then killed it so you could get away with whatever shit you wanted as long as you felt sorry?
Christian guy: Wow… I’ve never heard it put that way…
Queer: Sorry, I meant he killed him, it was a boy.

–Santa Cruz, California

Guy to couple: Hi!
Blonde wife: See, they're nice here, not like in California.

–Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: cherry picker

Incredibly preppy college student: Oh my god! We're on the bus! This is where the magic happens!

–Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: Bemused High School Student

Tourist: Hey, the water is coming up really high.
Local: Yeah, it’s definitely a high tide today.
Tourist: How come it does that? I mean, what makes the water come up so high?
Local: Well, let’s just say it has a lot to do with the moon.

–Pismo-Oceano Dunes, California

Overheard by: janie

Girl: Are you going to go back to 24 Hour Fitness?
Guy: Gayness in my anus…

–Pacific Beach, California

Trendy overdressed girl: Oh my god, did you see all those teenagers lurking outside? They think they're so fucking cool! God!
Trendy overdressed guy: I know.
Trendy overdressed girl: It's like, ever since we turned 20, I can't believe we ever hung out with people like that.

–Long Beach, California

Overheard by: 22-year-old who's glad she never hung out with either of them

Dude: What does that mean anyways, ‘Catch you on the flip side,’ huh?
Chick: Yeah, where the fuck is the flip side?

–Dockweiler Beach, Playa del Rey, California

Overheard by: kitty

Little girl voice: Get a flame thrower! (a few minutes later) Firegirl gets iced!

–Oceanside, California

Overheard by: What goes on in my neighborhood?

Woman to another, trying to get support to protect the seals: Yeah, my daughter's friend wants to be a marine biologist. She is so smart.
Daughter's friend, in confused voice: Hey, I got gum on my camera.

–Children's Beach, La Jolla, California