Rack

Drunk girl who just flashed her tits: Here, I’ll show you, but I know you’re going to laugh.
Bouncer: Like I’m gonna laugh at your ID — I just saw your tits!

–Outside Mercury Bar, Honolulu, Hawaii

Overheard by: Here tits were pretty funny

Teen girl to friend: If you don't stop, I will punch you in the tits.

–Pacifica, California

Teen girl: He saw some girl’s boobs.
Father: Did you see some girl’s boobs?
Toddler boy: Nooo.
Father: Did you see some girl’s boobs?
Toddler boy: Nooo.
Father: Were they as big as Grandma’s?
Toddler boy: Nooo.

–Point Pleasant, New Jersey

Overheard by: hc

Girl: I didn’t realize my nipples were dark until I went to sleep-away camp and the girls in my tent were like: “Um. Wow.” I went topless in Jamaica and they were, like, black when I came back.

–Long Beach, Long Island, New York

Overheard by: Colleen

Perv #1: Dude, check out that girl!
Perv #2: Which one?
Perv #1: Over there, in the yellow suit!
Perv #2: What? She can’t be more than twelve!
Perv #1: Dude, I would totally do her!
Perv #2: You need help, man. She doesn’t even have tits.
Perv #1: I’m not a titty man.
Perv #2: Yeah, well, your boyfriend in prison will be glad to hear that.

–Island Beach State Park, New Jersey

Overheard by: Steve

Girl on phone with guy friend: You know, my sister just got her tits done for her birthday… I don’t want you fucking her.

–Jones Beach, New York

Petite and topless blonde: When I get my boobs done, I'm gonna like… Walk around school with my tits out all the time.

–South Beach, Miami, Florida

Overheard by: mar

Girl: Am I going to have big boobs?
Flat-chested mom: Um, probably not.
Girl: But boys like big boobs!
Flat-chested mom: Only dumb boys do, because only dumb girls have big boobs.
Girl, after thinking for a minute: Grandma has huge ones.
Flat-chested mom: Oooh, look at the pretty birds!

–Panama City Beach, Florida

Bimbette: My nipples are hard.

–Wasaga Beach, Ontario, Canadia

Teenage girl #1: Are my nip nips showing?
Teenage girl #2: Your what whats?
Teenage girl #1: (points) My nips. It’s blinking cold, you know.
Teenage girl #2: Er… Ohh, that. Nope, can’t see a thing.
Teenage girl #1: You better check from time to time, okay? Like seriously. I don’t care, I need to poke them back in.
Teenage girl #2: But even if you poke it back in, it just pops back out like nobody’s bussiness! What do you do then, keep poking?

–Sunway Lagoon, Malaysia

Overheard by: babybhang