Wet teen boy #1, rubbing eyes: My eyes hurt.
Wet teen boy #2: From the salt?
Wet teen boy #1: Nah. I’ve been outside for two days. They’re used to video game light only.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: long time mom
Wet teen boy #1, rubbing eyes: My eyes hurt.
Wet teen boy #2: From the salt?
Wet teen boy #1: Nah. I’ve been outside for two days. They’re used to video game light only.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: long time mom
Young boy: Don’t fire the rocket launcher until I can go and get it! I’m already down to my third layer of skin, cuz the rest of it burned off!
–Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: Narwhal
Salty sea dog: And the new LED Christmas lights? They’ll never burn down your Christmas tree. You’ll have to do that yourself.
–Morro Bay, California
Overheard by: Colin
Wrestler #1: The other day I went in the water, and I forgot my cell phone was in my pocket. It doesn’t work anymore.
Wrestler #2: Was it on?
Wrestler #1: Yes.
Wrestler #2: Well, you should have turned it off before you went in!
–The Black Sea
Bikini girl to friend: Yeah, I’d suck a dick for an iPod touch.
–Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Girl #1: Yeah, and then I threw a book and it hit her in the throat. I was like, “hi‐ya!“
Girl #2: Oh, why didn’t you text me afterwards?
Girl #1: I was busy because then I threw one at her stomach. “Hi‐ya!” Times four!
–Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Teen boy, to anorexic teen girl #1: Why do you keep your phone in your thong?
Anorexic teen girl #2: Well, where else is she going to put it? She has no boobs.
–Cape Cod, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sam
Dumb girl talking to small group of friends: Only famous people use Twitter.
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: Janelle
Mechanic, returning car: I got a wireless cable.
–Wildwood Crest, New Jersey
