Co‐ed: But the book wasn’t even that long, and I drive stick, so I can really handle my phallic symbols.

–Daytona Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Liz Burrin

College chick on cell: I’m like, ‘Why do I have to have dreams about us breaking up? Why can’t I have dreams like I used to… Like when I was fucking Bob Saget?’

–Fort Lauderdale, Florida

Overheard by: Ava

American law student girl: So, you know, in Spain, why is there a beeping sound when the traffic signals change?
English barman: That’s so that blind people know when the traffic has stopped.
American law student girl: Oh my god! You let blind people drive?

–Marbella, Spain

Overheard by: the future of justice…

Obnoxious blonde instructor to riding student: That was beautiful! It looked like water ballet!

–Horse Show, West Palm Beach, Florida

Poli‐sci professor, on international military education and training: It’s like going to Harvard… (class is silent) …Harvard grad school. It’s really prestigious.

–UC Santa Cruz

Duke guy: Have you read Rebecca?
Duke girl: Of Sunnybrook Farm?

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina