Race

American tourist, to black islander carving a sculpture from a log: You people are so talented!

–Straw Market, Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Dumbfounded Tourist

Black girl with southern accent: If the world ends it's dem negro's fault.

–Tampa, Florida

Girl gives little boy a ball.

Little boy: Good looks.
Girl: Good looks?
Little boy: Yeah, that’s what black people say.

–Rockaway Beach, New York

Overheard by: sparky

Doctor: This woman came into the ER the other day who had cut herself on the forehead, but instead of using a towel or something to stop the bleeding, she wrapped her head up like seven times with duct tape.
Dork: Holy shit! How did you get it off of her?
Doctor: We had to cut it off in little strips. She looked like a Hershey’s Kiss.
Dork: What, you mean she was black?
Doctor: Yes!

–Crane Beach, Massachusetts

Preppy guy #1: God, this place totally sucks.
Preppy guy #2: No, it’s fine. You just need to embrace your inner boat person.
Preppy guy #1: Jeffy, I think these are motor boat people.

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina