Vendors

Vendor: Hey, buy some pizza!
Chick: I don’t like bread.
Vendor: Then just eat the cheese!
Chick: I’m lactose-intolerant.
Vendor: Fro-zen yo-gurt!

–Venice Beach, California

Beach vendor #1: Ice cold corona! Aaargh!
Beach vendor #2: Ice cold water, beer! Aaargh!
Beach vendor #1: Yo, we need wigs.
Beach vendor #2: Next time I'm wearing a pirate costume, don't get it twisted.
Beach vendor #1: Ice cold corona, aargh!

–Brighton Beach, New York

Woman, buying concert t-shirt: How do these run? Big? Small?
Salesman: Well, they run a little small so I usually get a bigger size.
Woman: No, no. I have just had liposuction all down my back so I want mine to be really tight.

–Biloxi, Mississippi

Overheard by: SusanPC

Junk jewelry salesman: Come on in here and see our stuff, señorita! We rip you off less!

Overheard by: tee

–Open air market, Tijuana