Tourists

Fat tourist lady: So then he yelled “I'm going to poop on your chest, you'll see!”

–South Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Captain K

Middle aged tourist yelling frantically to children in the water: Get out, get out! There's sharks!
Teenager with skimboard: Actually, those are a school of stingrays. They're quite harmle…
Middle age mother, cutting him off: Shaaarks! Get out now!

–Clearwater Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Jonica Grompson

Black guy playing drums, smiling at toddler nearby: Hi, sweetie. What you thinkin’? [Passing white lady tourist takes picture, and black guy frowns.] I respect you, too! Do I take a picture of you at the insurance office in Iowa?!
White lady tourist: Well, I–
Black guy: –Step off, bitch! [Turns back to little girl] Don’t grow up to be like her, baby girl.

–Venice Beach, California

Overheard by: This place sure has changed since the 80s

Young male Australian tourist on cell: We've already been to a service station and a McDonald's, which is different.

–Rotorua, New Zealand

Overheard by: exactly how different to McDonald's in Australia?