Girl: I’m trying to learn some Spanish before we go to Puerto Rico in May.
Guy: I took two years of French in high school, and all I can say is ‘Donde esta la biblioteca.’
–Mexican restaurant, Kemah, Texas
Girl: I’m trying to learn some Spanish before we go to Puerto Rico in May.
Guy: I took two years of French in high school, and all I can say is ‘Donde esta la biblioteca.’
–Mexican restaurant, Kemah, Texas
30 something guy standing at bar: So she asked me if I had ever slept with a stripper.
Friend: What did you say?
30 something guy: I told her the truth… I said “yeah, I slept with a stripper, of course.”
–Austin, Texas
Sorority girl: He’s fucking GAY! How the fuck am I supposed to fuck a fucking gay guy?!
–Galveston, Texas
Preteen boy #1, whispering to pal: Dude! Look at that girl lying over there. Her bikini’s pulled up so tight it’s up in her snatch.
Preteen boy #2, whispering back: Quiet… Damn!
Preteen boy #1: What’s that sticking out?
Preteen boy #2: I think it’s hair, dude.
Preteen boy #1: They got hair down there?
[they high-five each other]Preteen boy #1: It’s kind of gross and cool at the same time.
–Padre Island, Texas
