Lifeguard #1: So, what would you do if somebody came to you with a bat bite?
Lifeguard #2: Ummm… Clean up the wound, I guess.
Lifeguard #1: [Long pause] What would you do for someone with a clown bite?
–Echo Lake, Maine
Lifeguard #1: So, what would you do if somebody came to you with a bat bite?
Lifeguard #2: Ummm… Clean up the wound, I guess.
Lifeguard #1: [Long pause] What would you do for someone with a clown bite?
–Echo Lake, Maine
Queer: It turns out sleeping with a deaf guy is awesome!
–Penn’s Landing, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Chris Newcomer
Little girl: Mommy, what’s that red stuff in your bathing suit?
–Public bathroom, Hilton Head, South Carolina
Overheard by: Arya
