From The Big Book of Clumsy Pick-Up Lines

Girl #1, approaching girl #2: Um, you should work on your self-esteem more.
Girl #2: What? Who are you?
Girl #1: Take your shorts off. You’re gonna get an ugly tan line.
Girl #2: I’m okay with that, thank you.
Girl #1: What do you care if you are fat? Love yourself!
Girl #2: Fuck off! Who asked your opinion? Who are you?
Girl #1: Hey, can I bum a cigarette?

–Topanga State Beach, Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: Freaked Out By CA Chicks

Posted on April 17, 2022
Assholes, California, Diet and Weight, Girls, Insults, Smoking, Stupidity, Sunbathing

There Is No "They," There's Just Us; Let's Get Fucked Up

Student to friend: I think they should illegalize tobacco, and legalize pot.

–University Campus, Honolulu, Hawaii

Posted on April 8, 2022
Advice, Compare and contrast, Drugs, Hawaii, Smoking, Students

I'm Not Pregnant

Man: I can’t believe how much gas we saved by renting that car instead of taking mine.
Woman: Yeah, but how come you can fart in it, but I can’t smoke?

–Oregon

Posted on January 12, 2021
Oregon, Smokers, Smoking

Smoking

From The Big Book of Clumsy Pick-Up Lines

There Is No "They," There's Just Us; Let's Get Fucked Up

I'm Not Pregnant