Preppy girl: So about this swine flu thing… like, who would want to have sex with a pig?
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Kermit
Preppy girl: So about this swine flu thing… like, who would want to have sex with a pig?
–Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: Kermit
Chubby man, kicking around the sand: Hey, have you guys seen a set of keys over here?
Asian girl: Um. No. Sorry.
Chubby man: Shit. I must have buried the car keys in the sand on accident. My wife’s gonna kill me.
Asian girl: I haven’t seen any keys, unfortunately.
Chubby man: Hey, do you think the beach has a Lost and Found box anywhere?
–Big Beach, Maui, Hawaii
Overheard by: Responsible Tourist
Chick #1: Hey, have you heard of those Rice Krispie treats? They’re awesome. They should so make a cereal out of those or something!
Chick #2: You dumbass, they are cereal!
Chick #1: Oh…
–Robert Moses Beach, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: i like rice krispies
Girl #1: We need shade. I don't want to get burned.
Girl #2: Wha'd she say?
Girl #3: She says she's gonna be a little bitch.
–Playa Mia, Mexico
Overheard by: Peeto
Long Island wife: Shawn! Shawn, you idiot, your son wants to come swimming with you!
Long Island husband: Did you just call me an idiot?
[A fight erupts and wife is so upset she starts packing.]Long Island husband: What are you doing? You said you wanted to go to the beach today!
Long Island wife: We’ve been to the beach, and the beach fucking sucks!
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: sat near them on the plane going home two days later, too
Man with small child on his shoulders, rubbing his bald head: Rub harder! Make a wish!
–Bethany Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Arlene M Franks
Drunk teen guy: If I had a vag, I'd totally stick drugs and shit up there!
–Lavalette, New Jersey
Overheard by: I have one, but I don't
Petite and topless blonde: When I get my boobs done, I'm gonna like… Walk around school with my tits out all the time.
–South Beach, Miami, Florida
Overheard by: mar