Rhode Island

Teenage girl to friend: Ew! You just slapped your condensation on me!

–Block Island, Rhode Island

Overheard by: diorette

Teenage girl to friend: Ew! You just slapped your condensation on me!

–Block Island, Rhode Island

Overheard by: diorette

Stoner #1: Do you want a Bud or…?
Stoner #2: Bud.
Stoner #1: I also have Sam Adams Summers Ale.
Stoner #2: Bud.
Stoner #1: And Bass Ale.
Stoner #2: No ales!

–Bonnet Shores, Rhode Island

Overheard by: I like Ales

Tween #1: So, like, what did you eat in Africa?
Tween #2: Like rice and stuff.
Tween #1: Like white rice or brown rice?
Tween #2: White rice.
Tween #1: Like, ew. You can get so fat from that! Oh my God, is that why those Africans in those picture you have, have huge bellies?
Tween #2: You are beyond retarded!

–Second Beach, Newport, Rhode Island

Chick, passing another reading Brave New World: That girl was reading a book about Columbus, I think.

–East Matunuck State Beach, Rhode Island

Overheard by: it's got a Savage, but no Columbus

Ana #1: Oh my god, look at that guy. He’s huge!
Ana #2: Like, really, someone needs to introduce him to Weight Watchers or something!
Girl passerby: Hey, snugglebutt! [Gives large guy hug and kiss.]Ana #1: What the fuck?
Ana #2: Girlfriend? That fat whale?
Girl passerby: Husband. And you two might have men in your lives if you actually had boobs rather than a caved-in skeleton chest. Come on, schnookums, let’s go get some ice cream.

–Westerly, Rhode Island

Overheard by: blanket not far away, lauging my ass off

Buff guy, after ordering an extra “floater” shot on top of his strawberry daiquiri: Is ordering that gay?
Friend: Not any gayer than drinking a daiquiri.

–Newport Beach, Newport, Rhode Island

Overheard by: ThoseGuys

20-something girl: I can't believe I let my career go. I could have been the new Paris Hilton, but like Spanish. Caliente!

–Lincoln Woods State Park, Rhode Island

Lifeguard, walking into parking lot: They can’t make me stay here.

–Misquamicut Beach, Rhode Island