Little girl: Do you have a boyfriend?
Older girl: Not right now.
Little girl: Do you kiss guys on the lips?
Older girl: Well…
Little girl: Do you kiss your dad on the lips?
Older girl: Not that I can remember, no.
Little girl: You don’t kiss your dad on the lips? I kissed mine on the lips this morning!
–Palm City, Florida
Overheard by: MBD
Middle aged tourist yelling frantically to children in the water: Get out, get out! There’s sharks!
Teenager with skimboard: Actually, those are a school of stingrays. They’re quite harmle…
Middle age mother, cutting him off: Shaaarks! Get out now!
–Clearwater Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Jonica Grompson
Little city boy chasing seagull on the beach: Come here, you flying chicken!
Mom: That is not a chicken, that is a pigeon or something!
Little boy: I said come here, come here, you chicken head!
–Seaside, Oregon
Seven-year-old boy: Dad! Dad! Dad! It’s time to go back to the room. I need to put on underwear — I’m starting to chafe!
Dad: Good for you. Now go back out there and deal [continues smoking his cigar].
–21st Street Beach, Ocean City, Maryland
Young Boy: Mommy Mommy, they have Nemo in that fish tank!
Mom: Honey, Nemo’s dead.
–Antigua, the Caribbean
Overheard by: Ollie
Little boy: I can’t believe we went under. I still have that taste in my mouth!
Dad: Get used to it. You’ll be tasting that your whole life.
–Horseneck Beach, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kp & Cd
Young boy: Your uncle peed on Mikey last night!
–Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, California
Little boy: Was that lady a ‘he’ or a ‘she’?
–Hilo, Hawaii
Overheard by: Gwen
Boy: Hey, Dad, are monkeys fast?
Dad: I guess compared to humans, yes.
Boy: Are cheetahs fast?
Dad: Yes, they are the fastest.
Boy: Are lions fast?
Dad: Yes, very.
Boy: Are bamboozles fast?
Dad: What?
–Trunk Bay, St. John, US Virgin Islands
Overheard by: Sonia
Four-year-old girl (disappointed, looking at a jellyfish): I’ve never seen one of these before…but I thought it would be longer.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: I Was Surprised Too
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
