Overheard At The Beach 2017-08-19T04:46:55Z https://overheardatthebeach.com/feed/atom/ WordPress https://overheardatthebeach.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/cropped-beach-favicon-32x32.png beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Oooh, Blood- Good One!]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1553 2017-08-19T04:46:55Z 2017-08-19T04:46:55Z Black guy to puking white guy: Yup, I know what that's like. I do that every morning, brother! –Long Beach, Long Island, New York

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Playground Basketball Turns Men Into Animals]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1909 2017-08-18T15:25:23Z 2017-08-18T15:25:23Z Dad to toddler son who is stretching out his arms: If you put an elbow in my face, I'm gonna eat it! –Hotel, Orange Beach, Alabama

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[At Last, Texas Has Found Its Purpose in the US]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=197 2017-08-18T02:49:40Z 2017-08-18T02:49:40Z Tourist: Hey! You guys musta cleaned up real good after all the hurricanes last year. Everything looks brand new again.
Beach attendant: Excuse me?
Tourist: Yeah, you guys did a better job than all those FEMA guys in New Orleans.
Beach attendant: We didn’t get any hurricanes on the West Coast.
Tourist: You must have better levees here then.
Beach attendant: Yeah, we have Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and the rest of California. –Laguna Beach, California

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[You Know the Rules]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1241 2017-08-17T13:59:05Z 2017-08-17T13:59:05Z Skinny white guy: I think I need to go sit in the shade for a while.
Skinny less-white guy: What?! If you are going to talk crazy, I need you to be drunk. –Will Rogers Beach, Santa Monica, California Overheard by: Panda

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[At 40, after Three Failed In-Vitros, Kassidy Was to Remember This Conversation]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=941 2017-08-16T23:48:12Z 2017-08-16T23:48:12Z Little girl: Are you a mom? You look like a mom.
College student: No. How old do you think I am?
Little girl: Fifteen? –Palm City, Florida Overheard by: MBD

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[That's Just Nature's Way of Telling You They're Done]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1050 2017-08-15T23:34:24Z 2017-08-15T23:34:24Z Teenage girl #1: Are my nip nips showing?
Teenage girl #2: Your what whats?
Teenage girl #1: (points) My nips. It’s blinking cold, you know.
Teenage girl #2: Er… Ohh, that. Nope, can’t see a thing.
Teenage girl #1: You better check from time to time, okay? Like seriously. I don’t care, I need to poke them back in.
Teenage girl #2: But even if you poke it back in, it just pops back out like nobody’s bussiness! What do you do then, keep poking? –Sunway Lagoon, Malaysia Overheard by: babybhang

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Won't Stop Her from Giving You Shit.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1782 2017-08-14T23:18:59Z 2017-08-14T23:18:59Z Guy to woman: I'm not going to have a nervous breakdown like you did, and I'm not going to have irritable bowl syndrome like John. I'm going to visit mom less often. –Manhattan Beach, New York

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Then That Toast You Made Me for Breakfast Was All Lies?]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1511 2017-08-13T23:16:48Z 2017-08-13T23:16:48Z Mom to toddler: Do not take your bathing suit off! You can't walk around naked! We're not French! –Ocean Beach, New Jersey

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[You Can't Take Clint Eastwood Anywhere.]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1578 2017-08-12T23:12:48Z 2017-08-12T23:12:48Z Surfer dude to flabby, uninterested friend: Are you seeing this? That seagull is frickin' staring me down. Look at him. Are you looking at him? He's giving me the eye. That motherfucker is going to shit on me at some point today, and he wants me to know it. –Ocean Beach, California

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beach http://beach.wpengine.com <![CDATA[Death Drives American]]> http://beach.wpengine.com/?p=1255 2017-08-11T23:06:48Z 2017-08-11T23:06:48Z Drunk guy to drunk friend, seeing approaching car: Hey! Watch out for death! –Terrigal, Australia

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