18-year-old girl #1: I wonder what we’ll be like in college…
18-year-old girl #2: I think I’ll be a slut.
–Cable Beach, Bahamas
Overheard by: Rachel
Archive for the ‘Bahamas’ Category
So If You Die, I’ll Just Hit “Reset”
College guy: First of all, this isn’t real life. This is vacation.
–Coco Cay, Bahamas
Overheard by: Madi
The Bible Omitted the Serpent’s Jet-Ski Pitch
Local dude, trying to get me to buy a jet-ski ride: You can drink and drive. It’s paradise!
–Paradise Island, The Bahamas
Overheard by: Drunken Swimmer
Or Swedish?
Drunk woman to woman coming out of water with snorkeling mask: Oh, I was thinking about getting one of those! Is it worth the money?
Woman in mask: Absolutely! There’s tons of sea urchins, coral, plants, fish…
Drunk woman: Tropical?
–Atlantis Resort Cove Beach, Bahamas
Overheard by: Maggie
He’s a Full-Time Burnout
Girl with lower standards: I think you should go out with Spook. Yeah, I like him for you.
Girl with higher standards: He’s a drug dealer. Why would I want to date a drug dealer?
Girl with lower standards: He’s not a drug dealer.
Girl with higher standards: He sells me weed all the time.
Girl with lower standards: That’s just his part-time job.
–Cabbage Beach, Paradise Island, Bahamas
They Really Should Schedule the Beer Competition before the Sex
Italian MC on the PA: Fifteen minutes to Bocce ball tournament, volleyball tournament… Sex on the beach! Beer tournament at six!
–Fortuna Beach, Grand Bahama Island
Then Why Do You Keep Making Me the Designated Driver?
Six-year-old boy, fully dressed in Lacoste: I am almost your age.
Father, fully dressed in Lacoste: You are not almost my age.
–Atlantis Resort & Casino, Bahamas
Can You Get That Back in Manhattan, Kids?
Tourist woman: You know, I heard this island is completely surrounded by water all the way around!
–Coco Cay, Bahamas
Overheard by: Shelley
And They’ll Fight Your Enemies to the Death
Teenage girl #1: Yeah, my dad’s getting re-married this summer.
Teenage girl #2: Omigod, my dad just got one of those Filipino mail order brides, and let me tell you, they make the best egg rolls ever.
–Nassau, Bahamas
Overheard by: Spring Break wooooo!
Like They Do with Our Astroturf Lawn
Chubby eight-year-old boy, walking and kicking sand up with his feet: Woah! Ma! Look at this! They’ve even got real sand here!
Exasperated mom, clutching French fries: No shit! It’s real sand! Buying fake sand would be dumb. Everyone would steal it.
–The Bahamas
Overheard by: Fake sand maker
