Girl: How do *you* know the spaceship isn’t the entrance to my entertainment centre?
–Adelaide, Australia
Overheard by: T
Archive for the ‘Australia’ Category
And Not a Good-Looking One, Either
Aussie queer: I know that guy’s gay. That’s got to be his sister. A minute ago a guy came walking up to him that had the same look — tattoos, short hair… That’s usually a giveaway, right? Monkey’s face.
American queer: Monkey’s face? What’s that mean? Is that another Australian colloquialism?
Aussie queer: No, I was just saying the guy’s face looked like a monkey.
–Bronte Beach, Australia
I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means
Little boy: I don’t want to put on sunscreen!
Older sister: Do you want to look like a Nang?
Little boy: What?
Older sister: Well, that’s the thing about Nangs, they get burnt!
–Byron Bay, Australia
And with That Attitude, You Never Will
Girl #1: So anyway, when me and Dale went shopping last night–
Girl #2: –No! ‘Dale and I’…
Girl #1: … No, you didn’t come.
–Hotel, Sydney, Australia
Which Is Why I’m Oddly Drawn to Starbucks Coffee
Drunk girl: I think I am sexually attracted to fire.
Sober girl: Yeah…let me know how that goes.
Drunk girl: It burns, but I gotta admit I love the smell of burning pubic hair in the morning.
–Gold Coast, Australia
Or Sunblock
Mother to screaming child throwing sachets of sugar: Do that again and you won’t get a babycino.
–Café, Bondi Beach, Australia
Overheard by: GGary
…And, to Be Fair, I Now Know More About Female Anatomy Than You’ll Ever Know
Boy: Man, I can’t believe she’s studying, on a Sunday! What a loser.
Girl’s voice, yelling from inside house: I can still hear you…
–Gold Coast, Australia
In the Kingdom Of the Pantless, the One-Thonged Man Is King
Seven-year-old girl to friend: Kyle says he’s going to go through all the girls’ bags and steal their undies.
–Outdoor Swimming Pool, Victoria, Australia
Overheard by: Mr. E
I Mean, Short and Stout? Daaamn.
Thug carrying baby strapped to chest: Yo, those lyrics were fucked up, man!
Asian gangsta: Word.
–Bondi Junction, Sydney, Australia
Australian Life, Encapsulated
Girl #1, in shade: Wanna go down to the water?
Girl #2: Sure!
Girl #2, in water: Wanna go back to the tree?
Girl #1: Yeah. I do.
–Sydney, Australia
