Archive for 2018

Also the Idea behind Lifesavers Candy

Girl #1, whispering: Oh my god, I’m choking on this macaroni.
Girl 2: Then how are you talking?
Girl 1: The macaroni is stuck in my throat straight up, and I’m breathing through the hole in the noodle.
Girl 2: Ohhh, that makes sense.

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: jenny

Jesus, Bitsy!

Preppy 60-something #1: Now you only owe me 10,463 martinis.
Preppy 60-something #2: Yep, she owes me a bunch, too.

–Kennebunkport, Maine

Overheard by: Amused Locals