Archive for 2015

But They're Priced Up for the Tourist Trade

Tourist lady looking at photo of sea otter: Oh, you have salt water beavers here?!
Local guy: Yes, we do.
Tourist lady: Do they have a name?
Local guy: Yes, we call them ‘snatches.’
Tourist lady: Did you hear that, honey? They have snatches here!

–Schooner’s Wharf, Cayucos, California

Overheard by: Local girl

Hostel II

Swedish guy: Are you the hippies?
Dreadlock guy: I guess so.
Swedish guy: So, you hippies, do you have the orgies?
Dreadlock girl: Um… We decide that on a hippie by hippie basis.
Swedish guy: Oh, because you say ‘Yes,’ and I sign up now.

–Queenstown, New Zealand

Overheard by: sue

AKA 'Potato Lung'

Dude #1: So, apparently he died from consumption.
Dude #2: Oh, man, I would hate to die from constipation… I think I almost did, once.
Dude #3: Is that what happens when you get tuberculosis?

–Martha’s Vineyard, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Juan Dude

Plus, That Species Of Dragon Has a Much Shorter Wingspan

College girl to college guys carving dragon in the sand: Ugh! What is wrong with you?! Dragons do not have such muscular arms!
College guy: Ours does!
College girl: I am torn: do I continue arguing about tiny dragon arms as if dragons are real or move on to mocking you for giving your dragon the biceps you wish you had?

–Virginia Beach, Virginia