Archive for 2015

Possibly in a Nunnery

Tattooed woman with cast: Did you see the dancer on stage with the horse tail?
Pale friend: I am ready for a vacation.

–South Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Scott on SoBe

I'm So Fat and I Haven't Had My Period for Eight Months! I Must Have a Tumor.

Girl: My nipples are so sore! I think they’re sunburned.
Nipple-Savvy friend: Is that even possible?
Girl: What else would explain the pain? [Shows nipple]Nipple-Savvy friend: Maybe your boyfriend shouldn’t bite them so hard, yeah?
Girl: He didn’t bite them!
Nipple-Savvy friend: I can see the bite marks.
Girl: Oh.

–Miami Beach, Florida

Overheard by: A beach bookreader