Little boy: Was that lady a ‘he’ or a ‘she’?
–Hilo, Hawaii
Overheard by: Gwen
Archive for the ‘Weirdness’ Category
You Said I Could If I Was Good, Mom
Waspy overexcited college guy: And then after? Can we suck helium? Please!
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: kgw
Translation: the Ocean Scares Me
Young black male: Yo, I wish this was an urban beach. Like Chicago.
–Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina
Without Having to Open Your Eyes
Drunk dude: I like mescaline for breakfast, because then all day you see all kinds of different shit.
–Pacific Beach, California
Just Because You Named Your Triplets “Bed”, “Bath”, and “Beyond”…
Blonde teen: You know that woman we saw at Ikea last year, the one that was like, massively, explosively pregnant?
Brunette teen: Yeah?
Blonde teen: Well I’ve been wondering…
Brunette teen: If she’s had her baby yet?
Blonde teen: No, I wonder if she named her baby “Ikea.”
–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia
Overheard by: Jedda
Plus, That Species Of Dragon Has a Much Shorter Wingspan
College girl to college guys carving dragon in the sand: Ugh! What is wrong with you?! Dragons do not have such muscular arms!
College guy: Ours does!
College girl: I am torn: do I continue arguing about tiny dragon arms as if dragons are real or move on to mocking you for giving your dragon the biceps you wish you had?
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
But Mummy, I’m Too Old to Nurse in Public!
British mother to young child: Either put it in your mouth or I’m giving it to charity!
–Miami Beach, Florida
Great White Ones!
Little black kid: Why can’t we go in the pool?
Friend: What pool? That ain’t no pool, nigga, it’s got sharks in it!
–Coney Island Boardwalk, New York
All Up in Your Hoo-Hoo Zone
Seven-year old boy: Those boys over there are looking at you.
Bronzed teen sister in bikini: Oh really? [Looks pleased.]Seven-year old boy: Yeah. I guess it’s cause you have that weird sunburn.
–Liberia, Costa Rica
The Warden Won’t Let Us Bring It Into the Prison
20-something girl: We can’t make Eric a “sorry you got raped” cake anymore.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
