Bimbo #1, happily: It's so thick!
Bimbo #2, wide-eyed: Did you slap it?
Bimbo #1: No, I poked it.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Emmy
Archive for the ‘Virginia’ Category
No, Let's Talk More about the Cheese
Woman: Where are you from?
Twelve-year-old boy: Minnesota.
Woman: Oh, yeah, you have really good cheese there.
Boy: Ummmm…
Woman: Oh, wait. No. That’s Wisconsin. They have really good cheese.
Boy: Yeah. They do. But I’m from Minnesota.
–Virginia Beach
*Gasp*
30-something blonde: I was really calm, which is such a feat for me. Especially this day, since I had just bought an ice cream cone and the bottom of the cone was all soggy.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Sweedie
As Depicted in Debbie Does Dorsal-Fins
Drunk guy to girl: Hey, heeeeey. Sometimes I think about dolphins.
Girl (annoyed): Okay…
Drunk guy: Yes! See, they have sex for pleasure, like humans.
(girl giggles and walks away with friends)
–Smith Mountain Lake, Virginia
Ooo, Them's Fighting Words!
Teen to friend: That boy doesn't know his bivalves from his crustaceans.
–Colonial Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: I love me some bivalves AND crustaceans
…We've Demuzed Ourselves with This Conversation Long Enough.
Girl #1: Yeah, it's totally going to be my de-mice.
Girl #2: De-mice?
Girl #1: De-meese?
Girl #2: What? Demise?
Girl #1: Whatever.
–Virginia Beach
Such a Small Area, So Many Problems
20-something girl #1, coming out of water: Oh my god! I got stage fright, I couldn't go.
20-something girl #2: Oh, there's Danielle!! (points down to beach)
20-something girl #1: As soon as she gets here we're going back in, I have to pee so badly!
20-something girl #2: Hey, Danielle!
Danielle: Ohmigod, you guys! My herpes burns so badly!
(all three walks into water)
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Sweedie
Take It Up with God, Lady.
Tourist: What time is high tide today?
Lifeguard: I think it's around 6:30.
Tourist: Why don't you just have it at the same time every day?
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
How Men Learn Not to Confide in Women
Old lady #1: He told me he has never lasted more than three minutes with anyone!
Old lady #2: Really?? That poor, poor woman of his. No wonder she got a boob job and bites her nails so much.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Republicans: See? See?!
Teenage girl: I love carbs! I would marry them if eating your spouse was legal!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia