Beach cutie: So I was walking along the beach and thought I found a really colorful shell, but no! Entrails! –Aruba
"it's too late, ladies. The po-po already caught you!" bike cops on the beach busting 4 tourist girls on scooters driving thru a traffic jam. –Miami Beach Overheard by: pancho
Four-year-old boy: I want to go on vacation!
Mom: We are on vacation.
Four-year-old boy: No! This is Hawaii, I want to go on vacation! –Waikola, Hawaii
Little girl, maybe #6 years old: I want a dog! When I get my big brother, I'm going to name him killer! –Venice Beach, CA Overheard by: Anon Y. Mous
Man: Do you guys have anything to cut wood with?
Clearly drunk girl: Mah dick. –Cabrillo Beach
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Blonde soccer mom with kid to her friends: And then he licked my boobs. I was good that night. –Half Moon Bay, California
Little girl, playing in pool at hotel: Nana, what beach are we at?
Older woman: Myrtle beach.
Little girl: Murder beach!
Rest of kids in pool: Murder beach! We're at murder beach!
Little boy: Hey, let's play murder beach. I'll kill you and rob your dead body! –Myrtle Beach, South Carolina Overheard by: Marisa English
Thug to thugette: Who's that character in The Little Mermaid called? You know, that little crab nigga? –Norfolk, Virginia