Teenage girl: Aw, look at the little kid. He’s digging a hole to nowhere. How cute!
Teenage boy, completely serious: He’s digging to China, you stupid bitch!
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Marie
Archive for the ‘Stupidity’ Category
Newsflash: Pale, Fat Plague Strikes East Coast!
Girl #1: There are so many pale, fat guys here in Speedos.
Girl #2: It’s like they don’t care.
Girl #1: I know.
Girl #2: It’s so not like this in America.
–Waikiki, Hawaii
Why Don’t You Just Check the Polygraph?
Stoned girl: It’s really windy today. I wonder what it is on the Richter scale?
–Brighton Beach, United Kingdom
Overheard by: Chicken King
Think We Should Fly South with the Flock?
Bimbette to friend: Why is it so cold? It’s a beach!
Passerby: Yeah, a beach in November… Dipshit.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: dr. obvious
The San Francisco Lisp More Than Makes Up For Those Cool Accents the Aussies Have
Girl #1: So, I want to move somewhere cool and foreign.
Girl #2: Yeah, that would be great. Where?
Girl #1: I dunno, somewhere like San Francisco or Australia.
Girl #2: That would be so cool.
–Mission Bay, San Diego, California
It’s a Journey, Not a Destination
Girl #1: And she was like, “Is it too blonde?“
Girl #2: Ah! Like, you can never be too blonde!
Girl #1: Exactly.
–Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: J.J.
The Voices in My Head aren’t Real, but They Make More Sense than My Mommy
Woman to six-year-old son repeatedly throughout the day: Get away from me. Go away! I said leave! I don’t want you here… Come back here where I can see you.
–Goddard State Park, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Claudia
Knowledge Just Interferes with the Wonder of It All
Chick #1: You can see Venezuela on a clear day from here.
Chick #2: Really?! I would love to go to Venezuela — I hear it’s a really nice island.
Chick #1: Um… Island as in South America…?
Chick #2: It’s right off of South America, right?
Chick #1: I guess you should have paid attention in geography class.
Chick #2: What does math have to do with it?
–Aruba
Overheard by: Erin from New York
This Old Thing?
Guy wearing “World’s Best Dad” shirt: Hey, honey, where’s Sadie?
Wife: You’re holding Sadie!
–Wakulla Springs, Florida
Twenty Minutes and Dozens of Claw Cuts Later, Mike Had His Answer
Random guy named Mike, after hitting on girl for twenty minutes: You know, I’ve always wondered, can crabs get crabs?
–Ship Bottom, Long Beach Island, California
Overheard by: beachweek ’06
