Freshman bikini girl #1: College classes are much more lame than I thought they would be.
Freshman bikini girl #2: Yeah. I mean, who cares about, like, the difference between Chinese and Japanese?
Freshman bikini girl #1: Yeah! Or algebra! Like anyone even cares!
Freshman bikini girl #2: Do you have more baby oil?
–Cocoa Beach, Florida
Overheard by: a professor who specializes in Asian cultures
Professor: Are you guys working or just following a stingray?
Student #1: Working!
Student #2: Um…
Student #3: Both.
Professor: Both?
Student #3: We’re using the stingray to randomly decide where to take our next sample. They eat invertebrates — it’s like a divining rod!
–Fergie Shoals, Florida
Overheard by: Justification is for the geeky
Little girl: Are you a mom? You look like a mom.
College student: No. How old do you think I am?
Little girl: Fifteen?
–Palm City, Florida
Overheard by: MBD
Student to friend: I think they should illegalize tobacco, and legalize pot.
–University Campus, Honolulu, Hawaii
University of Miami girl: If I wasn’t me, I’d think I was stupid.
–Miami Beach, Florida
College kid: But I was conceived in Florida, so that means I’m neutral!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Teen to group of college students: Hey… What are you guys up to?
College student: Playing hide-and-seek.
Teen: Well, I was looking to get high, but that works too…
–Encinitas, California
Overheard by: Actually was playing hide and seek
Co-ed: But the book wasn’t even that long, and I drive stick, so I can really handle my phallic symbols.
–Daytona Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Liz Burrin
Professor to group of girls covered in whitish goo: What happened to you?
Girl #1: Egg sac war.
Girl #2 and Girl #3: Yeah.
Professor: … Ugh.
Guy: I love this class.
–Fort DeSoto Beach, Florida
Overheard by: There’s nothing like lab in the field
College chick on cell: I’m like, ‘Why do I have to have dreams about us breaking up? Why can’t I have dreams like I used to… Like when I was fucking Bob Saget?’
–Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Ava
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
