Archive for the ‘Strangers’ Category

I Am Parko, Almighty Park­ing De­ity. Give Me Your World­ly Goods or Roam the Melt­ing Streets For­ev­er!

Park­ing lot at­ten­dant: Thir­ty dol­lars.
Woman: Last time I was here, you charged me five dol­lars.
Park­ing lot at­ten­dant: I should be charg­ing you the same amount as it is de­grees out­side. I should be charg­ing you like nine­ty three dol­lars.

–Hamp­ton Beach, New Hamp­shire

Over­heard by: arc, mich

Af­ter His Sex Change, Homer Simp­son Moved to Van­cou­ver

40-some­thing woman: You’re from Turkey? What lan­guage do they speak there?
Turk­ish guy: Uh… Turk­ish.
40-some­thing woman: There’s a lan­guage called Turk­ish? Re­al­ly? Do a lot of peo­ple speak it?
Turk­ish guy: Well, yeah, more than a thou­sand years ago in cen­tral Asia…
40-some­thing woman, in­ter­rupt­ing: Chi­nese peo­ple speak Turk­ish? I did­n’t know that!

–Van­cou­ver, Cana­dia

Hey, at Least He Con­nect­ed the Right An­i­mal with the Right Coun­try

Amer­i­can: Hey, you’re from Aus­tralia, right?
Aus­tralian: Yeah. I’m just here on hol­i­day.
Amer­i­can: Right. I thought you had an Aussie ac­cent. So you’re not fa­mil­iar with cars, hey? It’s all about kan­ga­roos where you come from?
Aus­tralian, laugh­ing: Yep… that’s right.


We Raised Him Free Range

Four-year-old sprays woman with his gi­ant wa­ter gun, and does­n’t stop af­ter she warns him re­peat­ed­ly.

Woman: I’m go­ing to talk to his par­ents! [Stomps to near­by cafe.] Who is re­spon­si­ble for this child?
Par­ent: Sor­ry. What did the lit­tle fuck­er do this time?

–Mar­maris Beach, Turkey