Dude: I don’t have an STD… But I want one!
–Panama City Beach, Florida
Overheard by: katie
Archive for the ‘STDs’ Category
But You Got All Pissy When I Told Them You Had Crabs!
Gay boy 1: No! I will not tell people you have herpes when you don't!
Gay boy 2: Fine, whatever! Only a real friend would, anyway!
–Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: Michael
…Word to Your Mother
Father to young son: Some holes have crabs!
–Alma, New Bruswick, Canadia
And I'm Just Itching to Talk about It
Four-year-old boy scampering on shore: She’s got crabs! She’s got crabs! She’s got crabs!
Mom wading in water: Stop saying that!
Four-year-old boy: But you do… They’re all over down there!
–Sharky’s Beach, Port Charlotte, Florida
A Blonde Twin
40-something guy: That must be like an all-you-can-eat salad bar of STDs!
60-something guy: She’s a twin.
–Pancake House, Redondo Beach, California
So My Strategy is to Throw Money at It and Run Away as Fast as I Can
Walker #1: So I think I am going to train for the LA marathon.
Walker #2: Really? What’s the cause?
Walker #1: Well, it’s for AIDS. Not that I have AIDS, nor know anyone who does.
Walker #2: Yeah, well, we all know AIDS is bad.
–Olympic & La Cienega Park, Los Angeles, California
The Catholic Church's Last-Ditch Ad Campaign
Girl #1: Man, I think I got a yeast infection from that dude.
Girl #2: That fucking sucks.
Girl #1: Tell me about it. Getting laid is killing my sex life.
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: hillary claire
Let Me Guess– You're Itching to Talk About It?
Little girl, running happily: Mom, dad!
Little boy: Guess what we caught!
Both, in perfect unison: Crabs!
–San Diego, California
Overheard by: the girl who received dirty looks from the parents for laughing
I've Tried Walking It Off Without Success
Guy on cell: I don't know, it may just be the chlamydia talking, though.
–Destin, Florida
Twenty Minutes and Dozens of Claw Cuts Later, Mike Had His Answer
Random guy named Mike, after hitting on girl for twenty minutes: You know, I've always wondered, can crabs get crabs?
–Ship Bottom, Long Beach Island, California
Overheard by: beachweek '06