Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category

She Wan­dered In­to a For­eign Film Fes­ti­val at the Bi­jou

Teen girl #1: Have you been go­ing to church late­ly?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I found a new church I re­al­ly like.
Teen girl #1: Re­al­ly?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, it like smells all creepy, and, like, they speak in tongues. It is re­al­ly scary, so I will prob­a­bly go to this one!
Teen girl #1: Cool. Maybe I’ll go with you.

–Shils­hole Beach, Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Why do those peo­ple have goatskins on?

A+

Girl with text­book: What’s the cap­i­tal of the Unit­ed States?
Boy: Wash­ing­ton, DC?
Girl with text­book: How many eggs to a dozen?
Boy: 12?
Girl with text­book: Where are the Jews?
Boy: Long Is­land?

–New York

In the Same Way That Tel­e­van­ge­lists Heal

Lit­tle boy: Mom, Jew­ish peo­ple are from the desert, right?
Mom: Yeah.
Lit­tle boy: So why are they in Mi­a­mi?
Mom: The beach is like a desert — with wa­ter, though.
Lit­tle boy: Oh. What about black peo­ple?
Mom: Sweet­ie, they’re just tan. They’re all just tan. Now go play. [pause] It’s like I’m heal­ing the world.

–Mi­a­mi, Flori­da