Girl: That big lady across the room is staring at you again. You know she thinks you’re hot — I bet she’s picturing you naked right now.
Guy, rubbing his nipples: She wants my body.
Girl: In a minute she’s gonna look over here and do that to you.
Guy: Are you kidding? That bitch would have to grow longer arms so she could reach below her knees.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Teen girl: I guess she has nice boobs, but they’re almost too nice.
Teen boy: Hey, give her a break. She’s only 13.
–Spofford Lake, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Nadia
New Jersey Guido: His nipples were as big as clouds…
–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: Peter Butter and Gina Jam
Hot girl to extremely fat guy transfixed by her boobs: What, are you comparing size? Shape? Cause mine might not be as big as yours, but they’re far perkier.
–Uvongo Beach, South Africa
Overheard by: dizziebean
Old man #1: This one girl, she let me play with myself.
Old man #2: Oh, yeah?
Old man #1: Yeah… And some of them even let you touch their tits.
Old man #2: Do you still go to Long Island for that?
–Compo Beach, Westport, Connecticut
Overheard by: Forgot my iPod
Bimbette: My nipples are hard.
–Wasaga Beach, Ontario, Canadia
Girl on phone with guy friend: You know, my sister just got her tits done for her birthday… I don’t want you fucking her.
–Jones Beach, New York
Black chick walks by two white guys on the beach.
White guy #1: She is pretty hot. I’m gonna go talk to her.
White guy #2: Chicks like that always have some huge black dude waiting to beat your ass for looking at them.
White guy #1: I can tell she dates white men.
White guy #2: How?
White guy #1: Her tits are fake.
–South Beach, Florida
Overheard by: PS
Black thug: Look at the tits and ass on that one.
White girl to friend: I think he thinks ’cause he’s speaking gangsta I can’t hear him.
–Hamilton Beach, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: Steph
Teen chick #1: I might want boobs like that.
Teen chick #2: Yeah, but then they’d get old and saggy.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: I.S.
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
