Preppy guy #1: God, this place totally sucks.
Preppy guy #2: No, it’s fine. You just need to embrace your inner boat person.
Preppy guy #1: Jeffy, I think these are motor boat people.
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Archive for the ‘Race’ Category
There’s Tan, and Then There’s Snookie Tan.
Black man to extremely dark black woman: Come out of the shade! Don’t you want to get tan?
–Aruba
Overheard by: Cassidy
Well It Is a Dirty Photo.
White girl, reviewing nude pictures of Hispanic girl: That’s why I would hate to be darker. Her vagina looks dirty.
–Deerfield Beach, Florida
What? I Didn’t Say It Was Me.
60-something African-American beggar: Send a nice Jewish boy through college. Send a nice Jewish boy through college…
–Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: drsteve
He Also Responds to ‘Hey, Chink!’, Though Not in the Same Way
Transmitted over lifeguard radio: We have a woman here reporting a lost man. Asian, approximately 40 years old, responds to the name ‘Lucky T.’
–Riis Park, New York
The Day of the Mom-and-Pop Brothel Has Passed
Wife: Yeah, but think of all those Asian girls we fucked. Now think of their husbands and boyfriends…
Husband: Yeah… If I was one of those nerdy, ugly white guys I’d be pulling mad Oriental ass.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: lora
And Yet You Paddle Like a White Lesbian
Inner city youth on kayak #1: You’re paddling like a nigga.
Inner city youth on kayak #2: Shut up, you’re black too!
–Catalina Island, California
Overheard by: DanO
Loretta Also Commented on the Number of Jews in Jerusalem
(on board a ferry full of black people)
Elderly southern woman: Seems to me there are a lot of blacks here.
Half deaf elderly husband: What?
Elderly southern woman: Blacks!
–Ferry, Bermuda
It Was Strange; Their Necks Were Chained Together…
Girl #1: I think more black people are making their way into the North Shore now!
Girl #2: I know! Yesterday I was at the beach, and I saw a couple of them. But they were being led around by some guy…
–Crane’s Beach, Ipswich, Massachusetts
In the Same Way That Televangelists Heal
Little boy: Mom, Jewish people are from the desert, right?
Mom: Yeah.
Little boy: So why are they in Miami?
Mom: The beach is like a desert — with water, though.
Little boy: Oh. What about black people?
Mom: Sweetie, they’re just tan. They’re all just tan. Now go play. [pause] It’s like I’m healing the world.
–Miami, Florida
