Guy on cell: Dude, you gotta come down here…I'm about to jump in the ocean and scream at the universe and I want you to help me! (pause) Okay, yeah, send the brown people down.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Archive for the ‘Race’ Category
From Etymology to Racism in One Easy Step
Rich lady with yappy dog: Well, ‘Caucasian’ has ‘Asian’ in it. Then again, there’s a ‘turd’ in every ‘Saturday.’
–Golden Gardens Park, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Disturbed
You Are? I Just Thought You Tanned All Year
Girl on cell: What? Baby, what are you talking about? Why would you want to adopt a Negro?
–Clearwater, Florida
Overheard by: Hana
I Was Hoping to Sustain Your Youthful Innocence a Bit Longer. We Hate Black People
Tween girl: Daddy, why aren’t there ever any black people at this beach?
Dad: Well, I’m not sure, but I think they don’t care for water and the sun.
–Carolina Beach, North Carolina
Overheard by: Chad
The Sun Finally Finished with That Chick
White muscle head to black muscle head friend: Hey, bro! You got tan! How’d you do that?
–Robert Moses State Park, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Cara
I Wonder If He Realizes He'll Never Go Back?
Skinny white guy, unaware that white girlfriend’s huge black brother is walking behind him: I don’t know why, but I just really want to fuck a black chick!
–Robert Moses, New York
Overheard by: Zep
Psst– Now It's More Fashionable to Blame the Muslims.
Black girl with southern accent: If the world ends it's dem negro's fault.
–Tampa, Florida
Tell You What: Give Your Money to Me, and Then You'll Have Genuine Motivation to Steal
Jersey girl: Why do we have to be all ghetto and start stealing stuff when we have money?
–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: alison
It's Not Channel Ocho?
Man: Honey, I don’t think this off-board thing is very safe.
Wife: Why not?
Man: There are so many Mexicans here…
Wife: We’re in fuckin’ Mexico!
–Mexican cruise
Overheard by: Lydia
There's Tan, and Then There's Snookie Tan.
Black man to extremely dark black woman: Come out of the shade! Don't you want to get tan?
–Aruba
Overheard by: Cassidy