Black man to extremely dark black woman: Come out of the shade! Don't you want to get tan?
–Aruba
Overheard by: Cassidy
Archive for the ‘Race’ Category
I'll Defend Your Irrational Beliefs to the Death
Creepy guy: Yeah, so you're Mormon?
Army guy: Yeah. I am.
Creepy guy: Good man, I respect that. I'm Italian and Irish.
–Ala Moana Beach, Hawaii
Overheard by: trying to tan
Yet We Can't Seem to Keep You Off Our Island
American tourist, to black islander carving a sculpture from a log: You people are so talented!
–Straw Market, Nassau, Bahamas
Overheard by: Dumbfounded Tourist
And Loves Acid.
Girl that won't stop talking: This looks a lot like my mother's house, but the colors are more tropical because she's Puerto Rican.
–North Florida
Overheard by: Amused
Liv Tyler: As Long As They Don't Find Out I'm Secretly Asian
Mother: Both of my daughters are allowed to marry Orlando Bloom if they ever want to. That is one gorgeous boy.
Father: Who’s Orlando Bloom?
Daughter #1: An elf.
Mother: No, he’s not.
Daughter #2: Yes, he is — he was Legolas in the Lord of the Rings.
Father: The elf was played by a black man?
–Carolina Beach, North Carolina
The Day of the Mom-and-Pop Brothel Has Passed
Wife: Yeah, but think of all those Asian girls we fucked. Now think of their husbands and boyfriends…
Husband: Yeah… If I was one of those nerdy, ugly white guys I’d be pulling mad Oriental ass.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: lora
Saves Us the Effort Of Learning Unpronounceable Names
White college girl: Every time I see them, I'm like, “Asians!” and they're like, “whitey!”
–Long Beach, California
Well It Is a Dirty Photo.
White girl, reviewing nude pictures of Hispanic girl: That's why I would hate to be darker. Her vagina looks dirty.
–Deerfield Beach, Florida
Only the Bourgeois Ones Say, 'Thanks'
Girl gives little boy a ball.
Little boy: Good looks.
Girl: Good looks?
Little boy: Yeah, that’s what black people say.
–Rockaway Beach, New York
Overheard by: sparky
Tonight's Movie: When Harry Punched Sally
Boy: I think what you just said is racism.
Biotech: I’ll give you racism, you black bitch.
–Williamstown, Melbourne, Australia
Overheard by: knee coal