(on board a ferry full of black people)
Elderly southern woman: Seems to me there are a lot of blacks here.
Half deaf elderly husband: What?
Elderly southern woman: Blacks!
–Ferry, Bermuda
Archive for the ‘Race’ Category
It Was Strange; Their Necks Were Chained Together…
Girl #1: I think more black people are making their way into the North Shore now!
Girl #2: I know! Yesterday I was at the beach, and I saw a couple of them. But they were being led around by some guy…
–Crane’s Beach, Ipswich, Massachusetts
In the Same Way That Televangelists Heal
Little boy: Mom, Jewish people are from the desert, right?
Mom: Yeah.
Little boy: So why are they in Miami?
Mom: The beach is like a desert — with water, though.
Little boy: Oh. What about black people?
Mom: Sweetie, they’re just tan. They’re all just tan. Now go play. [pause] It’s like I’m healing the world.
–Miami, Florida
Babysitters from the Projects are Just More Affordable
Boy: Good looks!
Girl: Good looks?
Boy: Yeah, that’s what black people say.
–Rockaway Beach, Queens, New York
Overheard by: Sparky
Only the Bourgeois Ones Say, ‘Thanks’
Girl gives little boy a ball.
Little boy: Good looks.
Girl: Good looks?
Little boy: Yeah, that’s what black people say.
–Rockaway Beach, New York
Overheard by: sparky
Arguably Kinder than Playing the Class Card
White hicks in car let out low wolf whistles.
White chick on sidewalk: I’m sorry, we’re just not into white guys right now.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: Beach Bum
Indigenous Australians: Thanks, but We’re Not Accepting Recruits
Little boy #1: I’m getting really tanned on this holiday.
Little boy #2: Yeah, you’re turning into an aboriginal. When I grow up I want to be an aboriginal like you.
–Batemans Bay, Australia
Ugh, Those Terrorists?
20-something girl, talking about new guy she’s dating: Yeah, he’s kind of indie.
20-something guy: So is his dick dark brown?
20-something girl, after a long pause: Not Indian! Indie!
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: Josh M.
And Loves Acid.
Girl that won’t stop talking: This looks a lot like my mother’s house, but the colors are more tropical because she’s Puerto Rican.
–North Florida
Overheard by: Amused
STI’s Don’t Discriminate, Dear Reader
Hot 20-year-old guy #1: I’m still dripping.
Hot 20-year-old guy #2: Dude, you banged that chick like a month ago and you’re still dripping?
Hot 20-year-old guy #1: Dude, duh! She was Latina!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
