Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category

Plus, That Species Of Dragon Has a Much Shorter Wingspan

College girl to college guys carving dragon in the sand: Ugh! What is wrong with you?! Dragons do not have such muscular arms!
College guy: Ours does!
College girl: I am torn: do I continue arguing about tiny dragon arms as if dragons are real or move on to mocking you for giving your dragon the biceps you wish you had?

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

You Ever Had a Fat Girl, Joanie?

Girl #1: I don’t get it — I’m in a sweater and I’m cold, but you aren’t and you’re wearing a tank top?
Girl #2: That’s because I’m fat.
Girl #1: Oh… Well, at least you’re honest!

–San Diego, California

Overheard by: Leah

So Narcissism…Makes Me Look Fat?

Girl #1: What do you say when people ask about me?
Girl #2: “She’s a narcissistic freak.“
Girl #1: What kind of narcissist am I?
Girl #2: (stares blankly)
Girl #1: A pretty oneee.
Girl #2: You want me to lie to you?
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: Just kidding – you’re not not pretty.
Girl #1: What?!
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: You’re saying I’m not ugly but I’m not pretty.
Girl #2: You’re in limbo between pretty and ugly, so being mean to me makes you ugly.

–Kure Beach, North Carolina

Overheard by: Bee