Woman to friends, as they decide where to set up: Let’s look for a part of the beach that isn’t so sandy, y’all!
–Kill Devil Hills, Outer Banks, North Carolina
Overheard by: R U Serious?
Archive for the ‘North Carolina’ Category
Um, Officially I Was “Just Chubby” and My Daughter Is My Little Sister
Beach lady #1: Oh girls, last night I was watching 16 and Pregnant.
Beach lady #2: My daughter watches that. Well, I think it is stupid! That would suck for those girls.
Beach lady #1: How stupid are these kids these days? That’s why my daughter uses safe sex.
Beach lady #2: Wait, weren’t you pregnant at 16?
–Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina
Overheard by: Emily
They Licensed Santa’s Technology
Father: No, you can’t go in there. There’s a bar, and it’s over 21.
Little boy standing in front of café stares at father.
Father: Quick, get away from the door before you set off the alarm!
–Duck, Outer Banks, North Carolina
God, I Miss Roseanne
20-something woman #1: She was bitching about how there was nothing to eat in the house, and so Bob* said, “you could go to the store,” and she said, “I don’t go to the store on my vacation. There are two things I don’t do on vacation: go to the store and cook.“
20-something woman #2: What is she even on vacation from? Sitting on her ass?
–Holden Beach, North Carolina
…I Just Use This One to Reach It
Small child, screaming: Do you have a boat?
Man in giant boat off shore: Yes.
–North Carolina
Overheard by: jen
What Isn’t Better Naked?
Cute guy, about credit card: Yeah, sorry it’s bent. I jumped off the bridge.
Clerk girl: You jumped off the bridge, huh? Yeah, it’s better if you do it naked.
–7‑Eleven, Manteo, North Carolina
We’ll Have to Try One of Those Sporting Goods Stores Like in Commando
Lady exiting 7‑Eleven: Honey, they don’t have any flamethrowers in there!
–Nags Head, North Carolina
Overheard by: matthew
‘Do What Thou Wilt,’ I Told It
Lady: I am completely at peace with my salad.
–Manteo, North Carolina
Overheard by: Sarah J
JAP Repellant 2K6
Girl: If I use cooking oil, do you think I’ll tan twice as fast?
Boy: No, but you’ll probably smell like bacon.
–Corolla, Outer Banks, North Carolina
Overheard by: Mandy
Magnifying an Image by 100x Totally Counteracts the Effects Of Shrinkage
Chubby, bald man to female friends: They should really put mirrors on the beach, facing out towards the water, so you can watch yourself in the ocean… No, not mirrors, JumboTrons! I would love to watch myself on a giant tv while I swim!
–Kure Beach, North Carolina
