Archive for the ‘New Hampshire’ Category

It’s Important to Do Things as a Family

Middle-aged man #1: They smoke crack and worship Satan.
Middle-aged man #2: Good.

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Bunny

Actually, It’s the Sequence of the Placement that Concerns Her

Woman #1: I don’t mind sand in my bathing suit or sand up my butt, but I don’t want sand in my mouth!
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: Yup!
Woman #2: Well, I guess that makes sense. There are a lot of things I would rather have in my butt than in my mouth.

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: velma

You Know How That Is, Mom.

Ten year old boy, flipping over on towel: Man, I’m sweating like a fat chick!

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Robin M. StPierre

What You Get for Eating Cafeteria Food

Five-year-old pulling her bottom lip down: I have herpes!

–Seabrook Beach, New Hampshire

NewsFlash: “Whence” Makes Comeback. Film at 11.

20-something male, chasing after another with driftwood: Go back to the sea from whence you came!

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

We Were Told This Was a Nude Beach

Pissed off mom to crying sons: You’re goddamned right, we’re leaving and we’re never coming back!

–Rye Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Robin M. StPierre

I Am Parko, Almighty Parking Deity. Give Me Your Worldly Goods or Roam the Melting Streets Forever!

Parking lot attendant: Thirty dollars.
Woman: Last time I was here, you charged me five dollars.
Parking lot attendant: I should be charging you the same amount as it is degrees outside. I should be charging you like ninety three dollars.

–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire

Overheard by: arc, mich