Girl #1: Ooh, he’s cute.
Girl #2: Tell him you’re easy!
–Ocean City, Maryland
Archive for the ‘Maryland’ Category
Could You Just Put the Cake at the Bottom Of the Sugar Bag?
Thin girl ordering funnel cake: I want so much powdered sugar on it that I don’t want to be able to see the dough!
–Ocean City, Maryland
Sniffling, Leroy Cut the Cards
Seven-year-old boy: Dad! Dad! Dad! It’s time to go back to the room. I need to put on underwear — I’m starting to chafe!
Dad: Good for you. Now go back out there and deal [continues smoking his cigar].
–21st Street Beach, Ocean City, Maryland
Idiot! They Hang Out with You to Improve Their Odds
Ugly girl to hot friends: No, I want to have sex… I’m just not liking my odds right now.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: K
God Does the Rest
Tourist: Where do they put the sand in the winter?
Local, sarcastically: Oh, they put it in bags and store it in the convention center.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: OC local
Probably Has Something to Do with the Location of His Brain
Dad, about bald passerby: That guy is really bald!
Daughter: Dad, you have more hair on your butt than your head.
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Ryan
I Just Realized How Much I Miss The Golden Girls
Large mother to screaming child: Stop that screeching or I’ll cut out your larynx!
Large mother to large sister: Where did she learn to screech like that?
Large sister: I don’t know, ask the one in the wheelchair. (points to grandmother in wheelchair)
–Ocean City, Maryland
I’ll Take “What’s in Her Underwear?” for $200, Alex
Redhead: Holy shit! A penis!
Blonde: What?
–Boardwalk, Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Boots
But If That’s One Of the PTA Requirements…
Overweight mother: I don’t want to be a gladiator!
–Ocean City, Maryland
Ehhh… about Six Inches
Blonde teen to hot dog vendor: How long are your foot-long hot dogs?
–Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: Hungry-Man-on-the-Beach
