Archive for the ‘Language Barrier’ Category

Af­ter His Sex Change, Homer Simp­son Moved to Van­cou­ver

40-some­thing woman: You’re from Turkey? What lan­guage do they speak there?
Turk­ish guy: Uh… Turk­ish.
40-some­thing woman: There’s a lan­guage called Turk­ish? Re­al­ly? Do a lot of peo­ple speak it?
Turk­ish guy: Well, yeah, more than a thou­sand years ago in cen­tral Asia…
40-some­thing woman, in­ter­rupt­ing: Chi­nese peo­ple speak Turk­ish? I did­n’t know that!

–Van­cou­ver, Cana­dia

Hey, at Least He Con­nect­ed the Right An­i­mal with the Right Coun­try

Amer­i­can: Hey, you’re from Aus­tralia, right?
Aus­tralian: Yeah. I’m just here on hol­i­day.
Amer­i­can: Right. I thought you had an Aussie ac­cent. So you’re not fa­mil­iar with cars, hey? It’s all about kan­ga­roos where you come from?
Aus­tralian, laugh­ing: Yep… that’s right.


Pay­back­’s a Bitch

Sag­gy-draw­ered kid: That woman car­ry­ing shit on her head.
Moth­er: Boy, you ain’t in Brook­lyn any­more. This place dif­fer­ent. And keep your voice down.
Sag­gy-draw­ered kid: Hell, she don’t speak Eng­lish. And what the hell com­put­er boy gonna do, re­port me to the in­ter­net?

–Tela Beach, Hon­duras

Over­heard by: Com­put­er boy, I as­sume

Mar­i­jua­na: The Uni­ver­sal Lan­guage

Guatemalan teen, pass­ing Amer­i­can teen on the beach: Quieres fu­mar?
Amer­i­can teen: Huh? What?
Guatemalan teen: Quieres fu­mar?
Amer­i­can teen: Bro, I don’t know what you’re say­ing. I don’t speak Mex­i­can or what­ev­er that is.
Guatemalan teen: Want smoke weed?
Amer­i­can teen: Oh. Hell yeah, why did­n’t you say that the first time?

–Monte Ri­co, Guatemala

Over­heard by: Man­go­Joe