Girl #1: So…plans for tonight?
Girl #2: Yeah, actually. I’m going out with Beto. He just moved to Niterói with his boyfriend.
Girl #1: Wait. What? His *boyfriend*? So he finally came out, eh?
Girl #2: Well…he didn’t come out per se. He just said, “So, this is my boyfriend, Bruno.”
–Ipanema Beach, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
Gay guy #1: Tom has such a huge dick! I swear I was walking bow-legged for three days! I think it might become a serious thing!
Gay guy #2: I know! He has such a huge dick!
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
12-year-old boy to boogie boarding pal: You just did a 360! That was so awesome! We should all give you blowjobs for that! Even your brother!
Friend: Dude, you are so gay.
–Monterey Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: Rebecca Anna Smith
Beach girl in group of people: Wait! Ellen DeGeneres is gay?! Since when?
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Colleen
Guy to another: I’m a man-loving man, man! Stop calling me a fag!
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: scrapes
Buff guy, after ordering an extra “floater” shot on top of his strawberry daiquiri: Is ordering that gay?
Friend: Not any gayer than drinking a daiquiri.
–Newport Beach, Newport, Rhode Island
Overheard by: ThoseGuys
Girl: He’s a whore. He’s a huge, huge, well-hung whore.
–Atlantic City, New Jersey
Guy, about his infant son’s abnormally long ass crack: Some day that one’s gonna be the toast of San Francisco.
–Sullivan’s Island, South Carolina
Overheard by: Reading Man
Teen male #1: I just saw two lesbians kissing in the water.
Teen male #2: What? Why didn’t you take a fucking picture?
Teen male #1: Right, I forgot to take my camera phone with me while diving into the water…
–North Crete, Greece
Band kid to another: It was both gay and funny, like Jesus and Fergie combined.
–Palm Coast, Florida
Overheard by: Dahbuke
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
