Mom to young child eating a Popsicle: Stop putting that in your mouth! It’s done, there’s nothing left.
Young woman nearby: That’s what he said.
–Long Beach Island, New Jersey
Overheard by: Tara
Archive for the ‘Food’ Category
Not That Kind Of Package
Girl #1: I’m hungry, let’s get crepes!
Girl #2: What’s a crepe?
Girl #1, after pause: It’s like a package made out of a pancake.
–Santa Barbara, California
She Went with the Sheep Testicles and a Nice Chablis
English girl reading menu: Oh my god. What? It’s all in foreign!
–Beach cafe, Northern France
Overheard by: Jess
Republicans: See? See?!
Teenage girl: I love carbs! I would marry them if eating your spouse was legal!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Daddy Sometimes Doesn’t Get Out of Bed for Days, Carnie
Little girl, crying: He’s not coming! He said he was going to come, and now he’s not coming!
Apathetic, topless, overly-tan mom: Go home. Eat something.
–Palavas-les-Flots, France (translated from French)
Overheard by: Christine
Why I Dropped Out Of My Cupcake-Eating Master’s Program After Only Half a Semester
Guy: Why do you have a wooden fork?
Girl: First of all, because it’s biodegradable; and second, it’s hard to eat a cupcake.
–Sprinkles, Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: M
Your Editors Love That Puno Is on the Shore of Lake Titicaca
Brother: I was talking to that couple from Montana, and they said they eat cattails.
Sister: I thought they were vegetarians.
–Puno, Peru
Overheard by: 451
We Should Stop Settling for Prunes
Fat redneck girl: You know what I wanted last night? A plum!
Skinny redneck guy: Me, too! Last night after me and you got in that fight, all I kept thinking about was how I wanted me a big, juicy plum!
–Navarre Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Wendy
But It Comes With a Bag of Chimps
Man: One small monkey bread, please.
Girl: What’s a monkey bread?
Man: I have no idea.
–Monkey Bread Café, Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Kristin
It’s French for “Goes Directly to Your Thighs”
Upset teenage daughter to mother: Mom, I can’t have sugar! (pause) What is “creme brulee,” anyways?
–Huntington Beach, California
