Guy standing at window: I love tit-ass!
Guy on boardwalk: Fuck yeah!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Roomate
Archive for the ‘Feelings’ Category
It’s Not the Content But the Style That Suggests This Kid Has a Future in Musical Theater
Small boy, carrying bag: Fudge! The wonderful joy of fudge!
–Bethany Beach, Delaware
Nah, Meg Ryan’s Face Just Looks That Way
Excited teenage girl on cell: Dude, that’s so beat!
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: Tim
How Do You Know that isn’t Ted Kennedy?
Woman: Is that where George Bush lives?
Man: No, you can’t see it from here.
Woman: I bet you could see it with binoculars or something.
Man: Doubt it.
Woman: Why do you always shut me down when I have an opinion? I’m entitled to it! How do you know you couldn’t see George Bush’s house from here?
Man: There’s an island in the way.
–Kennebunk Beach, Maine
Tonight’s Movie: How Stella Got Her Weave Back
Angry woman: You touchin’ my weave!
–Coney Island, New York
If My Slut License Didn’t Say I Have To
Guy #1: She told me that she wants to see other people.
Guy #2: You’re taking this all the wrong way. Now, you can nail that slut over there and she can’t be mad at you when you get back together!
Slut: I would never have you.
–Long Beach, New York
Dude, I Think She’s Advertising!
Preteen boy #1, whispering to pal: Dude! Look at that girl lying over there. Her bikini’s pulled up so tight it’s up in her snatch.
Preteen boy #2, whispering back: Quiet… Damn!
Preteen boy #1: What’s that sticking out?
Preteen boy #2: I think it’s hair, dude.
Preteen boy #1: They got hair down there?
[they high-five each other]Preteen boy #1: It’s kind of gross and cool at the same time.
–Padre Island, Texas
And the KGB.
Girl: I’m really allergic to bugs, so that’s why I’m scared of jellyfish.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: right, because jellyfish are just really big bugs
…And, to Be Fair, I Now Know More About Female Anatomy Than You’ll Ever Know
Boy: Man, I can’t believe she’s studying, on a Sunday! What a loser.
Girl’s voice, yelling from inside house: I can still hear you…
–Gold Coast, Australia
She Doesn’t Even Own a Bandana.
Bikini babe: She’s had sex before… but… like… only strap-on sex. So she’s totally a fake lesbian ’cause she still likes dick!
–Anna Bananas, Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: just getting some beers
