Archive for the ‘Crazies’ Category

Looks Like a Stand-off

Crazy bag lady: I’m Ozzy’s mommy!
Queer: No, you’re not! You’re a fucking gross woman who carries around used clothes and a knapsack full of tissues! Plus, Ozzy sucks!
Crazy bag lady: Fag!

–St. Petersburg, Florida

This Is What Happens When We Don't Bring the Electric Collar

Man, running as fast as he can across sand, screaming like a maniac: Molly! Molly! Molly!(entire beach crowd stares)
Man, running as fast as he can across sand, screaming like a maniac: Molly! Molly! Molly!(entire beach crowd stares)
Man, finding Molly sitting quietly: Oh, there you are.

–Lewes Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: maybe next time, take Molly with you