Woman, noticing fly on her arm: No, you cannot land on me!
–Huntington Beach, California
Woman, noticing fly on her arm: No, you cannot land on me!
–Huntington Beach, California
Girl #1: You know what would feel really good?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: If you jizzed on my back.
–Oceanside Beach, California
Dude #1: Wouldn’t it be cool if you could just get surgery to switch your heart and, say, your liver?
Dude #2: What?
Dude #1: Then, if someone came up to you and said, “I’m gonna stab you in the heart!” you could be like, “I’d like to see you try!”
–Dewey Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Suprchick
20-something girl: Oh my god! I have wrinkles in my cleavage!
–Adelaide, Australia
Overheard by: Oh No
Drunk girl #1: Oh my god, now I know what you mean about hooking up on a beach.
Drunk girl #2: What?
Drunk girl #1: The sand…it gets everywhere!
Drunk girl #2: Oh yeah, it is like all in my hair and my purse.
Drunk girl #1: No… I mean *everywhere*.
Drunk girl #2: What?
(pause)
Drunk girl #1: I have sand in my vagina!
–Naples, Florida
Girl: I think that bitch Ashley got me sick. You know how you can feel it in the back of your throat before it comes… Wow!
–San Diego, California
Man #1, stopping at free sample of fuge: Ohhh, fudge.
Man #2: Damn! It has nuts in it.
Man #1: I like nuts of all kinds.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Five-year-old pulling her bottom lip down: I have herpes!
–Seabrook Beach, New Hampshire
College guy, passing campus soccer field: Kick those balls, girl!
–Long Beach, California
Preppy white girl to black guy: You just jizzed on my arm and I don’t even know you like that yet…
–Tampa, Florida
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist