Chick #1: So like, I shaved my legs and then went to this party and there was this toootally hot guy there, but he didn’t want to hook up with me.
Chick #2: Well, I have this theory that you only get action when your legs are hairy.
–The Hamptons, New York
Girl #1 in stall: I think I’m bleeding.
Girl #2 in next stall: Do you have your period?
Girl #1: I dunno. Here, look.
Girl #2: I don’t want to look!
Girl #1: At my foot, dumbass.
–Wawa, Chadwick Beach, New Jersey
Little girl: Do you have a boyfriend?
Older girl: Not right now.
Little girl: Do you kiss guys on the lips?
Older girl: Well…
Little girl: Do you kiss your dad on the lips?
Older girl: Not that I can remember, no.
Little girl: You don’t kiss your dad on the lips? I kissed mine on the lips this morning!
–Palm City, Florida
Overheard by: MBD
Jogging man to jogging woman: I still have a jiggling six-pack.
–English Bay, Vancouver, Canadia
Overheard by: if it's jiggling, it ain't no six-pack
Mother to father: Oh my! Jerry, say something to that old man. His testicles are hanging out of his swimsuit.
Little girl: I have testicles. They’re in my mouth. [Opens mouth]
Mother: Not tonsils. Testicles!
Father: Seven, and already MTV has ruined her.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Book Reading Beach Bum
Guy with board, about water: It's flatter than my abs out here!
–Perdido Key, Florida
Little girl: Look! I can fit an entire Gatorade cap in my mouth! (demonstrates)
Teenage boy to teenage girl: That girl's going places.
–Long Beach Island, New Jersey
Dude #1: Wouldn't it be cool if you could just get surgery to switch your heart and, say, your liver?
Dude #2: What?
Dude #1: Then, if someone came up to you and said, “I'm gonna stab you in the heart!” you could be like, “I'd like to see you try!”
–Dewey Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: Suprchick
20-something girl: Oh my god! I have wrinkles in my cleavage!
–Adelaide, Australia
Overheard by: Oh No
Teen girl: My ribs are so big!
Mom: You can blame your father for that.
Dad: Your ribs are fine.
Teen girl: They look like a second set of boobs!
Dad: They look fine.
Mom: You know, you can get surgery to have some of them removed.
–Belmar, New Jersey
