Nerd, to blind date: And the best part about this guy is that he’s half man, half rat, and he’s living in a WOOD ELF society!
–Steak ‘n Shake, Palm Beach, Florida
Archive for the ‘Arts’ Category
Raise Your Hand If You’re Sick Of Eminem
Sweaty dude on boardwalk: I wrote a poem the other day. Wanna hear it?
Sweaty female companion, jogging away: Aw, hell no!
–Tampa, Florida
Their Brains Are in a League of Their Own
Movie critic #1: You know that movie, with Tom Hanks, where he plays the drunk baseball player? And the women are the players because the men are gone?
Movie critic #2: Where?
Movie critic #3: To war.
Movie critic #2: So the women played baseball? That wasn’t a movie.
Movie critic #1: You know, the movie has that star that’s on TV. Bette Davis’ daughter.
Movie critic #3: Who?
Debate goes on for several minutes.
Movie critic #1: Wait, it’s Geena Davis! She’s Betty Davis’ daughter! See the resemblence in the eyes?
Movie critic #3: Didn’t Betty Davis hate Geena because she was tall?
Movie critic #1: Well, she got the part anyway, didn’t she? Geesh, I wish I could remember the name of that movie!
–Nauset Beach, Eastham, Massachusetts
Someone Has Spit Out Their Gum Right Here in the Middle of This Drawing of a Penis!
Little boy, pointing to large drawing of a penis in the sand: Oh my God, that is disgusting. Dad, look, it’s disgusting!! Dad, do you know what it is?
Dad: Yes.
Mom walks over.
Mom: What is it?
–Popham Beach, Maine
Overheard by: Fitzy
‘Except for Comedians’? Ahahaha! Genius!
Bostonian #1: I was thinking I should try out for Saturday Night Live or somethin’.
Bostonian #2: Yeah, you should, Vin. You are funny!
Bostonian #1: Yeah, I know! I mean, who’s funnier than me? Except for, you know, comedians.
–South Beach, Martha’s Vineyard, Massachusetts
Overheard by: luna
