Archive for the ‘Arts’ Category

Pi­rates 2 Panned by Crit­ics; Deemed Too ‘Brainy,’ ‘Ref­er­en­tial’

20-Some­thing girl #1: Yeah, I fell asleep. It was a stu­pid movie! And that guy with the squid on his face, who was he, Medusa?
20-Some­thing girl #2: You mean Davy Jones?
20-Some­thing girl #1: Yeah. And I was like, what about The Mon­kees?
20-Some­thing girl #2: There weren’t any mon­keys.
20-Some­thing girl #1: You’re too young to re­mem­ber the Six­ties. Davy Jones was in the Mon­kees.
20-Some­thing girl #2: Um, Davy Jones the pi­rate came first. Haven’t you ever heard of Davy Jones’s lock­er?
20-Some­thing girl #1: I have ab­solute­ly no idea what you’re talk­ing about.

–Craigville Beach, Cape Cod, Mass­a­chu­setts

Like Cock

Big Brook­lyn dude #1: I re­al­ly wan­na see The Dev­il Wears Pra­da. I heard it’s the fun­ni­est movie ever.
Big Brook­lyn dude #2: Yeah, man, but I re­al­ly wan­na read the book first.
Big Brook­lyn dude #1: Yeah, yeah! It’s not just for chicks, man!
Big Brook­lyn dude #2: It’s not just for chicks.

–Rock­away Beach, New York

And Stay Out of Iowa

Black guy play­ing drums, smil­ing at tod­dler near­by: Hi, sweet­ie. What you thinkin’? [Pass­ing white la­dy tourist takes pic­ture, and black guy frowns.] I re­spect you, too! Do I take a pic­ture of you at the in­sur­ance of­fice in Iowa?!
White la­dy tourist: Well, I–
Black guy: –Step off, bitch! [Turns back to lit­tle girl] Don’t grow up to be like her, ba­by girl.

–Venice Beach, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: This place sure has changed since the 80s